it’s taken me a week to write this post, to properly do the experience justice. my ultrasound last friday was the most amazing, magical 30 minutes of my life. i saw my daughter, really saw her, for the first time. the last time i got to take a peak at her i was barely 8 weeks, and she still resembled a kidney bean with t-rex arms. this time, however, she was my little girl. she was my perfect, beautiful little sylvie. she was difficult, vibrant, stubborn, and a bit of a ham. she used my bladder as a punching bag and mooned us all more times than i can count. she is a perfect little challenge. is there any doubt who she takes after already? i hope there are some of her father’s better qualities lurking in there, otherwise we’re in trouble!
the ultrasound technician was great. she took her time, and measured everything carefully, saving the big reveal for last. luckily, she had been paying attention the entire time because when it came time to get a good look, sylvie would NOT cooperate. she had her feet behind her ears and her legs firmly closed. you see that big, round circle there by her feet? yep. that’s the top of her head.
i said something to the effect of, “this baby’s modest. at least i know i’m not giving birth to the next paris hilton!” after a little more looking around, the tech answered, “modesty is especially important when you’re having a girl.” it took me a second to process exactly what she said.
i immediately burst into tears. big, body shaking, spastic tears of pure joy. i really didn’t think i was going to cry. i tend to stay very calm during big events. i didn’t cry at our wedding, and i was so sure i would. i think the combination of raw emotion, hormones, and a full punching bag of a bladder did me in. my intuition was right all along. A GIRL. travis had me doubting it when he woke up two days before the appointment, so sure it was a boy. i just…KNEW from the day we found out i was pregnant.. i don’t know how or why.
my mom gave me this necklace, which belonged to my nana, on my 19th birthday.
i have worn it everyday since. now i wear it for two women. the star of david charm came from my husband on the first anniversary of our first date. one day, when sylvie is grown, i will give her both for her birthday. she will smile, and my heart will burst wide open.